Connection Overload

I'm a connector.
I talk to my best friend, Abi, via phone, text and/or IM at least 3 times EVERY SINGLE DAY.
Every. Day.
I spend a lot of time and emotional energy thinking about, talking to or talking about, my friends and family.
In fact, my marriage is right now in jeopardy because of my need to connect.
And the saddest part is that I'm realizing that I'm just not very good at it.

I'm needy. I'm demanding. I'm impatient. None of these will get you qualifed as a good friend.
And it seems no matter how hard I try, i just cannot shake my expectations. If a friend is hurting and I make
a gesture of comfort, it's because I want to ease their pain. I don't expect anything in return. Then when it's
my turn to ache, and someone fails to put their hand out, i feel hurt. It just doesn't make any sense.
I had a therapist a few years ago tell me "there is no 'should'". I agree with her and I WANT to believe that,
but that's just not how it works in my world.

So all of these crazy expectations I have (what do you mean you don't want to talk to me every day?
of course you do!) don't get met. So I get annoyed. Then sad. Then I call/text/IM you 400 times.
Then you think I'm a psychotic stalker and quit talking to me.

Did I mention I'm not very good at this?